Out of the Hat Box

As much as I hate to admit it, I don't like change. I'm not talking about the change I find in the bottom of my purse, but the kind of change that is life altering and paradigm shifting in nature. In fact, I've come to the conclusion that most of us if not all of us REALLY don't like change. We want things to be stable and have some sense of predictability. We want if not need to maintain a sense of normalcy in our daily lives and we rarely if ever do much to alter that. Most of the changes that occur in our lives have to do with outside influences that are out of our control: death, sickness in yourself or a loved one, accidents, someone else making decisions that affect us, and so on. . . Well, the time has come for me to make a change in my life that has already begun to alter it. I am Chanisha Rashaan Cochran-Wilson: I am a woman, a wife, a mother, a writer, an artist, and most of all a child of God. I am a royal Princess with the King of Kings for a Father. I have always worn all these hats but have been content to settle in with just wearing the wife and mom hat while ignoring the other hats sitting in the back of the closet. They have been screaming to be taken out of the hat box and into the light. Even the princess hat took a back seat for a while. My life has been the equivalent of wearing a baseball cap or silken nightcap everywhere I go even to formal functions when I have such a dazzling array of awe-inspiring hats to show off for the right occasions. It just doesn't look right! I allowed my fear of not wanting to make waves or not wanting to outshine others to hinder me from being the whole person God has called me to be. So as you can see, my blog has made some changes. There is a new look on my blog. I am changing my focus and taking it off of myself and placing it on the world around me. I am putting my "business" (literally) out in the street as I prepare to finish and publish two books and pursue other business endeavors. Be looking out for my posts on various blogs and ministries as I encounter them. Also feel free to comment and/or click the Follow button on the right of the screen and join me in my new journey. It's always nice to know who's watching and perhaps we can learn a lot from one another. Happy New Week!

Lots To Think About

Wow! It's been a year since I've posted on this blog and I am not as deeply ashamed of myself as I was for the other blog I have that I have not posted on in TWO years, but I am ashamed nonetheless. I was looking back over some of the things I wrote to myself to unknown others and I couldn't help but smile at how deep thoughts can run when you allow yourself to be open and free about what it is you feel and think. I've had so many life changes in the last year that I don't know if I actually processed them all appropriately. A new job come and gone, a new baby, a new kind of spouse (same guy, different behavior), a new outlook on where I'm going and how, and the realization that I just might be a little older and possibly a little wiser. I'm finding that not everything I want in life is really "it." I thought I wanted two children and that was all I could handle. Amazing how the stretched mind and body can be much more flexible than previously believed. I thought I needed a job in order for my husband to respect me and to give me the proper support. Isn't it something when you add more to your plate and discover that what you thought you wanted and what you actually want and get are remarkably different. I handled having a job and raising two and a half children the best way I could. I felt ashamed when I didn't succeed as I thought I should have and wondered if I was destined to "just" be a good mom and stay out of the gladiator's arena called career. But time at home with my three boys has proven a mighty healer and wonderful deliverer. The fact is, I AM a good mom. I AM a good employee. I AM a good wife. And even (more like especially) when I'm not trying to be; I AM a good person. None of those labels define me in and of themselves, yet without them I cannot be myself. This year is a very interesting one for me. I plan to do what I have always wanted to do. I'm going to write: More and more, day by day. Pretty soon I hope to get published somewhere. Even if not forever as a career, I want to do it just so that I can say I did it and I can do it. Even as I say that, in my heart I know I am a writer and if it were my only choice, I'd feel like I'm getting the better end of the deal. Anyway, Look up!