Friday, December 31, 2010

Advice for a Pre-menstrual Mother of Three on New Year's Eve

New year, new possibilities, fresh hope.

Don't waste your days rehearsing and remorse-ing ( a Cece-ism) the things you did "wrong", the things you wish you did, the things you are going to resolve to do but have already determined you won't do in the back of your mind. We've already established that this kind of thinking is a waste.

Just breathe.

Take a moment to just be thankful for the many good things in your life. There is always something to be thankful for if we can just take our eyes off of ourselves and our circumstances long enough. Catch your children doing something cute, spy a butterfly, focus on a tree bud, gaze at a the sky, think about something sweet that your spouse did for you, think on an accomplishment that was difficult for you, look at the things you do have in comparison to those who have nothing. Cultivate gratefulness and praise in your life. There are many good things that God has done, and by virtue of Who He is, He plans to do for us.

Don't dictate the party. 

Every new adventure and plan is like a little present just waiting to be opened. Don't waste so much time trying to make everything just so or trying to be cute. Jump into the mystery, tear off the paper,  and don't worry about whether or not you like your gift or if the gift is not/is/could be/should be what you wanted. Life isn't worried about what we always want. Most times life is about what we need and if we wait long enough and look hard enough we can see that it all is working out for our good in the end. Enjoy life where and when you are and be content with how the party goes.

Cliche alert: So don't be young and restless; These are the days of our lives and we only have one life to live so let us live life graciously with each day that we are given.

Nothing ever beat a fail but a try.

Feel the fear of the unknown and the future, but do it anyway. Fear is a natural human response, but let's get super-natural for a moment: God isn't the author of fear (insecurity, terror, timidity, indecisiveness): He wants so much more for all of us. No, it doesn't mean we're all supposed to be rich and famous or even rich or famous or whatever. That is a script and an ideal handed down for generations as a part of the "Great Escape". Life is what it is, and it doesn't (and shouldn't) have to be the same for everyone. We are all meant to fulfill our place in this world (be our piece of the grand puzzle that only God can see). We are all meant to be who we are and we just need to be placed.

Enjoy your movie.

Recognize that it's okay to cry when you watch an emotional movie even if it's not that "time" of the month. Don't go to the "man movie" with the blood-drenched, banshee-screaming, murderous bicep-clad warriors if you prefer a romantic comedy unless the romantic comedy includes the afore mentioned warriors: Then it's a win-win. Don't apologize for liking romantic comedies and definitely don't go see Iron Man twice in a row when you wanted to see The Holiday. You end up resenting Iron Man when he had nothing to do with it. In the end, Iron Man isn't the only one you resent when you realize you just wasted double hours of your life when all you had to say was "I don't want to see Iron Man."or "I don't want to see Iron Man, again." It's give and take. We all must give at some point in time but it doesn't have to be and shouldn't always be us. We don't have to defend being who we are. We are all uniquely and wonderfully made to see the world from our individual vantage point. God made it so.  You are you, and you are necessary with all of your unique wiring and skills and quirks and assets and faults. Be ok with being ok, and be ok with not always being ok. Just be.

Eat ye the cake (all of it).

Why settle for half a slice or half a cupcake (as if) when a whole slice is before you? There is no sainthood in pastry martyrdom. It's cake. The calories don't fall out with the crumbs and you knew what you were getting into when you took the plate. It's honestly emotional self-abuse. Don't do it to yourself. Besides you're also hurting the others who would have relished your piece of cake and theirs. Enjoy the cake and move on :0)  Also, don't you dare waste life's petit fours (or fudge) when you receive them: they are meant to be savored and enjoyed fully.

This was the best advice Someone could have given me: There is enough of everything in just one day to make our burden full. We've got 365 1/4 days to carry a different load and to try and try again. Let's not ruin today's math with our faulty additions and miscalculated subtractions.  .  .  Just be.

Happy New Year everyone and rather than just prosperity this year, I wish you Love and Peace.

Sunday, December 19, 2010

Joyeux Anniversarie & Noel!

I probably didn't spell that correctly in French, but then again most of English is misspelled French ;0). I can't help trying to do it though, it's my NOLA roots. It was 11 years ago today (literally) that I slept like a log, woke up to a gourmet bubble bath, a morning mani/pedi,  a breakfast buffet in a hotel with my "besties" and again I  took a nap (people still have a hard time hearing that) in my own little bridal suite at the grand church where my husband and I said "I do." and "I do too."

So much has changed since we first got married: babies, betters, worsts, rich-er (not in money mind you), poorer (definitely in money), but all in all, if I had to do it all over again (bearing in mind what financial investments I would and would not have made), I still woulda said "I do." I can't even say that my life is rosy at this point. In fact, I'm kinda wondering where the betters are, but I do know this: Regardless of what life throws at me, my spouse, my marriage and my children, I still trust God. I won't let go of Him, otherwise I don't believe I'd still be married (or have children). I suppose that makes sense because the marriage covenant is between God, my spouse and me. If we don't include Him, it's not a complete contract and you know what happens when contracts go bust. . .

Oh yes, update: I've just finished month 2 of my master's program and I think I'm going to need another brain.  Hopefully, I will be well enough at the end of the program to be able to use what I've learned if I can remember it. Well, at least there's the Holidays. . .

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