The Truth Is . . .

How many times does one have to hear a phrase or saying before one realizes it is the truth? Have you ever heard the saying the more one repeats a lie the more one comes to believe it until the line between fact and fiction is no more? Well, I've come to the conclusion that the more one hears the truth the more one believes it as well. Now here comes the fun question: What is truth? I am not one to debate about whether truth is relative to the person who espouses it. I don't debate at all. I just believe. Is there a truth relative for everyone? I believe there is, but then I'm finding that most of the truths that hit home the most are the ones that relate to my life and living. As much as I would like to do this, I cannot always escape the reality (truth) of my life. Some circumstances are what they are and can not be altered, others can change or be changed but there are certain truths about the self that just are what they are and do not change no matter how much we would like them to go away permanently. I have a hard time accepting the bad in me. Not becuase it's not true, but honestly because I don't like to think that I have negative traits that affect my life and living. It doesn't mean that those traits define me totally as a person, and it definitely doesn't mean I go changing the rules to "fit" so that I don't "feel" like a bad person. Does that really change anything anyway? It does seem to put me at the Crossroads of decision. Do I chuck the reality and make my own rules? Some would argue that there are no rules and rules are for the weak-minded. That in essence says there is no true reality (absolute truth). We may as well all be a part of The Matrix and bend our realities to fit with the situations as they come (seems like fun on the Big Screen but it would make me crazy after a while). I would dare to venture that living by rules(principles) actually puts things the other way around. It takes more courage for an alcoholic to admit it to himself first and then to others that he has a problem. It is his own personal truth, yes, but there are others who may be in the same or a worst position; who are unwilling to even realize such a problem in themselves. They may deny their own need and call him weak for his admission, but, why do they chide?I believe that deep down inside of all of us is a seed of truth that is a part of all of us and no matter how we try to bury it or "cover it up" to remove it remains. And for some of us it remains locked up until death. To me that is a sad waste of a fettered life. I believe subconsciously we know it's there and we choose not to acknowledge it, but it is there and with the right opportunity and exposure to the right elements it germinates and grows. Even then there are our attempts to pluck the seedling up and destroy it, but the funny thing about the truth is that it never stays dead long. It has a funny way of resurrecting itself. Perhaps that is why we chide one another: we see the "bad" in others that also resonates with in our own hearts. We then must acknowledge our own fallibility. It then brings all of us to the Crossroads of decision. Do we now continue pressing for the truth about someone else knowing that it also presses for the truth about ourselves? And then what do we do about that realization of the truth about ourselves when it comes? The concept of absolute truth can be frightening not just for those who choose not to believe it but also for those who do choose to believe it. But there is such a freedom about knowing yourself and accepting the truth but even more for me because I know the truth about myself (good or bad) and then I'm no longer stuck I have the freedom to move forward down whichever path I choose because it is now a choice.